Monday, June 17, 2024

How To Pull Yourself Together & Stay Happy When Life Knocks You Down?

Do you feel that life is knocking you down whenever you get a glimpse of happiness? Does it seem that every smile on your lips comes with a high price you are not sure you wish to pay? I’ve been in your shoes, and I wish I could say your future will be all milk and honey. All I can say is that you have the power to make everything better.

I know just how you can do that. I learned it from my mom as a child. I perfected it through practice, getting back up whenever life knocked me down. I happened quite a few times, so you can trust that my methods work. Besides, you have nothing to lose by trying them. Check them out and see for yourself!

What Does It Mean To Pull Yourself Together?

Pulling yourself together in life means that you overcome the state of unawareness and awaken to make the best out of your life.

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For instance, if you have been constantly surrounded by negative influence, pulling yourself together means you identify that you are a victim, and make your stand against the relationship that was ruining your life.

Examples of pulling yourself are:

  • Getting rid of toxic relationships
  • Having control over your emotions
  • Getting yourself organized
  • Being disciplined
  • Committing to break bad habits or behavior patterns

How To Pull Your Life Together And Make Your Stand?


1. Bring Positivity Around You: Avoid Toxic People In Life

Toxic people can drain you emotionally, mentally, and even financially. There are a lot of unnoticed signs that we miss in identifying if a relationship is toxic. Sometimes, even our best friends and family can be toxic.

To get your life together and pull yourself, it is best to learn how to deal with toxic people in life.

2. Focus On The Silver Linings: Does Your Situation Seem Awful? Remember It Could Be Worse!

No matter how bad things may seem, they can always get a little worse. Are you broke? You could be homeless and disabled as well. Are you down with a cold? Others are fighting cancer and still smiling. It probably seems silly, I know, but stop thinking about your own problems for a minute and look around you.

I bet you can find quite a few people willing to trade places with you. Compared to them, you still have a reason to smile. So stop feeling sorry for yourself and start envisioning your luck. Stop crying that your glass is half empty, and take joy in the fact that it is half full when it could be empty.

3. Show Gratitude: Stop Focusing on What You Are Missing. Focus on What You Have and What You Can Do with It!

As a child, I grew up watching my mom trying to cook for five from almost nothing. Yet, she somehow managed to put food on the table. When I learned to cook, I used to go to her and complain that I didn’t have the necessary ingredients for whatever I wanted to make.

My mom took me to the fridge, opened it, and said. “When you look inside, you see the things we do not have. There will always be something missing. You can get upset and not cook at all, or you can find something to cook with what you do have”.

As the saying goes, “when life gives you lemons, make lemonade.”

4. Stick Around People You Can Hang on to, Who Believe in You

It feels good to be around people your own age, to party as much as you can. However, when things get tough, most of these people will turn their back on you. Hang out with them if you wish, but make sure you have someone to hold your hand and listen to you when things get tough.

You need people to listen to you when you feel like ranting, encourage you when you are not sure you can succeed, and stand by you when you fail. It goes without saying that you have to give a little something in return. However, the right people will only want your time and presence, your friendship, and nothing more.

5. Give Yourself a Break

Stop torturing yourself thinking of things you did not do or could have done differently. Stop worrying about the future as well. Take a deep breath, get some sleep, take a long, hot, scented bubble bath, and have a glass of your favorite wine. Life will seem better, easier.

Sometimes, we tend to cause a storm in a glass of water, to approach small failures as if they were the end of the world. A night’s sleep, a drink, a talk with a friend, or a long bubble bath can help sweeten that perspective. Even if it doesn’t, you’ll need the added strength, energy, and relaxation.

6. Treat Yourself to Something You Love or Want

In high school, my English teacher basically adopted me. When I had problems at home, I used to run to her, tell her everything, and ask for advice. Sometimes, she gave me money to buy something for myself. Other times, she invited me to share a cup of hot chocolate or some ice cream.

Whenever you’re upset, buy a book, a pair of shoes, or something you like. Eat a small piece of chocolate, drink your favorite juice, or play your favorite game.

You will feel better, and whatever caused your anger, pain, or suffering will seem easier to bear. It basically means you need to rediscover the pleasures of life to find the power to overcome any obstacles.

7. Learn from Your Mistakes, and Never Look Back

If you’ve reached a dead end, rock bottom, or a desperate situation, it means you did something wrong. Don’t worry, as we all make mistakes. The only difference between losers and winners is that winners learn from their mistakes and move on.  Instead of focusing on your mistakes and punishing yourself for making them, learn your lesson, and move on.

Perhaps you trusted someone, and they betrayed you. Perhaps you placed all your eggs in the same basket, and the basket fell and broke them.

You can’t turn back time and undo what you did. You should move on and avoid repeating your mistakes. You know what they say: “Fool me once, shame on you; fool me twice, shame on me!”.

8. Love Yourself

I left the most important thing last, but the order shouldn’t matter. What matters is that, to be happy, you need to accept and love yourself for who you really are. Sure, you’re not perfect, incredibly smart, or irresistible. You may be in a tough position right now. However, at the end of the day, you are all you have.

You can hate yourself and wish to be someone else, or you can embrace who you are and work on those small imperfections. Take it from me: I’m chubby, talkative, and pretty boyish. I wish I were more delicate and princess-like. However, I would have never survived had it not been for my ability to say what I think and want, to do stuff no one would expect a woman to do, to survive in the harshest situations.

Sure, I try to stay quiet now and then, I sometimes trade my sneakers for high heels, and I occasionally put on makeup. However, I always speak my mind and stick to my principles. It has paid out so far, and I’m sure it will payout in the future as well. I don’t have many friends, but I know I can trust those around with my life. Also, when I go to bed in the evening, I don’t need to take off any masks, and this definitely improves my sleep.

Concluding thoughts,

Try my above-suggested tricks, and I’m sure you’ll sleep better and breathe easier as well. Life is hard, but it wouldn’t be worth living if it weren’t. We wouldn’t enjoy the good stuff if we didn’t have to face the bad stuff to get to it.

If you agree, share this post with your loved ones. If you don’t or have something to add, don’t hesitate to drop a comment. I’m not saying my recipes are infallible, but I know for sure they make a great starting point from which to create your own.

Take care and good luck!

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Mihaela Olaru
Mihaela Olaru
Mihaela is a sociologist, an English – Romanian translator, the proud mother of two joyful girls and the happy wife of her soul mate. She turned writing into a career in 2010 and has never looked back. She spends her leisure time by cooking healthy foods, reading princess stories, watching movies, playing games in the park, or walking along the Danube.

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